I decide, after reflection, to journey to Tor (Glaivas’ hometown) and to ask for his help in travelling secretly through the dark and mysterious area along the local river.
Tor is a city of 500,000, but I know Glaivas’ address, and don’t allow myself to be distracted by comic book stores and local bars.
While walking to my destination, I confirm to the book that I do not possess the Shin-Ren skill. Hopefully I don’t miss anything important.
When I arrive, Glaivas is waving goodbye to a local lady, whose face is made up to resemble a young child. I realise that this appearance is because she is a priestess of the God known as Time. Whatever. Sure, Glaivas, I’ll accept that excuse this time.
Glaivas, upon hearing my story, admits that he knew of my father, and that in this time he was a wise and popular ruler. This will, presumably, help with the drafting of press releases for my inevitable election campaign.
When (call-back alert!) I remind Glaivas of his previous reluctance to discuss cities on the Greybones River beyond the city Tor, and advise of my wish to travel that way to Irsmuncast, he pulls out a map with a number of new locations marked.
Awesome names alert! The Lands of No Return, the Forest of Fables, the Fangs of Nadir, the list goes on.
Glaivas agrees that my chosen path is the best way of arriving at Irsmuncast undetected, but states that the dangers are so great that I may not arrive at all. Just to emphasise the seriousness of this, it coincidentally (!) starts to rain as the sky darkens. Apparently two evil rulers fight for control of this area, being respectively based in the Walls of Shadow and the City of the Runes of Doom. The ruler of the latter is the Fleshless King, an immortal necromancer who has slaves toiling in his fields until they drop dead. Seriously, with a surname like King, what sort of mother gives their boy a name like ‘Fleshless’??
The whole province sounds like a simply fantastic vacation spot.
Glaivas does agree to guide me through this bleak land, and we leave the following morning. No word as to how many tequilas I had to buy him to get his agreement on this point.
While chatting as we travel, and after exchanging opinions on political issues, Glaivas advises that Mandrake the assassin (remember him?) remains interested in my whereabouts, and then suggests that we strike out north cross-country rather than sticking to the roads.
Only a moron would enlist the help of an expert, and then ignore the expert’s advice, so I follow Glaivas’ lead and leave the main road.
That night, as we rest, I have an ominous dream involving a ‘black bubbling cauldron’ in which a Fiend is being brewed, presumably with dark designs on my well-being.
I’m still waiting, on these adventures, for dreams which involve a date with Kate Upton and Jennifer Lawrence.
The next day, we mosey through the forest, minding our own business (given what is about to happen, I want to emphasise that fact). Spotting one leopard, we give it all due respect, until its unseen friend leaps on top of me, causing 4 Endurance damage. As it springs at me once more, I can either block its attack, or meet it head on with an Iron Fist punch.
Given that Glaivas is presumably (fingers crossed!) about to assist me, I elect to block. I am bowled to the ground, but my block protects my throat and Glaivas, the leopard whisperer, speaks a few words and manages to calm the animal and ensures that it quietly trots away. No word as to whether this technique also works on telemarketers or ex-girlfriends.
We continue, as Glaivas tells me ‘where to watch’ for other leopards. At this rate, while watching in the trees for leopards, I’ll probably step on a snake.
Stats : Endurance : 16, Punch Modifier : +1, Kick Modifier: +3, Throw Modifier : +1, Fate Modifier : +1, Inner Force : 5
Awesome names : Didn’t you hear me?? Pretty much everything on that map of Glaivas’ radiates bad-assery.